Six years after the Pittsburgh rapper, singer-songwriter and producer Mac Miller passed away, his fans have been graced with a collection of hauntingly beautiful tracks. “Balloonerism” pulls back the curtain to reveal some of the most experimental, psychedelic and raw visions in Miller’s discography.
Around the time that “Balloonerism” was recorded, Miller was in a transitionary period in his career. Between 2013’s breakthrough album “Watching Movies With The Sound Off,” which marked the beginning of his ventures into the more introspective and mature music with a good heap of the humor and goofiness he was already known for, and the brighter and braggadocious sunshine of “GO:OD AM” two years later. Both albums received critical acclaim and bolstered Miller’s popularity, but the middle child mixtape, “Faces,” is the project that really showed off what he was capable of. Over the course of 24 tracks, struggles with identity, fame, depression and drug abuse are explored over jazzy beats with samples from Bill Murray’s comedy “Meatballs” thrown in the mix. Miller would later go on to tweet, “I was not on planet Earth when I made ‘Faces.’ Nowhere close.” This disconnect between reality and his perception can be seen in lines such as “Mirror mirror on the wall, I’m staring at a dead man” on “What Do You Do.” If “Faces” was delivered from another planet, “Balloonerism” comes from the moment before lifting off and leaving Earth.
After a 30-second tambourine intro track, “DJ’s Chord Organ” opens the album, with Miller playing a few airy and ethereal chords on an organ. SZA delivers the lone verse of the song, singing to a lover who has been driving around for days. Is he driving to her, or away from something? Neither of them know, and they both struggle in their search for the answer. This search for purpose and identity is a central theme of the album and continues on the next track, “Do You Have A Destination?” Miller feels as though the trajectory of his life is slipping away from him, despite constants like the friends he keeps close and asks himself “Will you follow? Where are you going?” “Tomorrow Will Never Know” is the final and most haunting song on the album and confirms that nobody knows exactly where their trajectory leads or if they really have any control over it. The track features contemplative verses comparing the living and the dead – dealing with mortality as something as fragile as a frozen lake, fated to melt in the spring. A line “from God” asserts that living and dying are the same, but the questions and uncertainty continue. The endlessly ringing phone throughout the track is the last thing to fade out in this closer. The listener is left with a feeling, almost of despair. However Miller’s key message is not to give up; it is that you should not worry about what you cannot change, and the good and the bad inevitably accompany each other.
Still, it is true that knowing the future is brighter does not always help you in the midst of a troubled time. As Miller says in “Rick’s Piano,” “The best is yet to come. I told her, ‘It get better soon,’ I probably shoulda told her when she was in a better mood.” Miller’s personality is so effectively used on this album that the listener accepts the message he is sending, despite the ominous overtones on most tracks. He begins “Funny Papers” with a humorous English accent, and “5 Dollar Pony Rides” is delivered with an eccentric and almost shouting voice. “Stoned” describes a narrator and his love interest getting stoned to escape their troubles. While that is not usually a hopeful scene, contrasting the subject matter against the hard drugs mentioned in other songs paints a joyous picture, especially alongside the sensual riff. “Manakins” also discusses Miller’s message, the opening lines being “Well, my good days are exactly like the bad ones.” This only furthers the idea that your journey is what you make of it.
“Balloonerism”’s atmosphere, made of groovy basslines and skeletal keys, creates a beautiful duality between Mac’s hyper-awareness of mortality and the ways he coped with that. If you have enjoyed Mac Miller’s music in the past, there is something for you to get out of this project, be it great rapping, gorgeous songwriting or contemplative lyrics, especially in such troubling times.