When Donald Trump first ran for president, I was 12 years old. Experiencing an election at that age was…interesting. Seventh-grade me knew two things about the 2016 election: we could get our first female president or our next president could be the orange guy who regularly got into Twitter (rip) wars with celebrities. Let us just say I was pretty shocked waking up the next morning.
I am even more shocked now that he is still running for president. I am all for never giving up…but at a certain point, enough is enough. He did say though he would stop running if he loses this election, so like…promise?
Honestly, Trump missed his calling as a stand-up comedian. “Ron Desactimounious is in dire need of a personality. Too bad for him, those are…not yet available” is a line I think about constantly. In another lifetime, Trump would kill it as one of the judges on RuPaul’s Drag Race. Too bad we are stuck in this one.
One of the best things that came out of this election was the Trump x Biden ship. After one too many (who am I kidding- you can not have too many) “Triden” TikTok edits to a Chappell Roan song (not sponsored by the way), a girl gets curious and decides to look on Archive of Our Own. For the lucky ones out there who did not spend their middle school summers reading slow burns till 3 a.m., waiting for their favorite ship to hold hands, Archive of Our Own (or AO3 as the cool people say) is a website where people can post fanfiction of their favorite ships. And as a surprise to a whopping nobody- Triden has a good amount of fanfics, 764 to be exact. What is this generation?
Do not get it twisted, we can also make jokes about Kamala Harris. Particularly, her love of coconuts. It might just be me, but coconuts are not good- why is she so obsessed with them? I would understand her obsession more if it was a different tropical fruit- like mangoes. Mangoes are great. “You think you just fell out of a mango tree”… it works so much better.
Ever since Kamala got the democratic nomination, she has been riding that BRAT wave, and I am all for it. I hope that if Kamala wins, she brings out Charli XCX to perform at the inauguration. Who cares if Charli XCX isn’t an American citizen? We can make an exception. I am just waiting for Kamala to make an appearance at the Sweat tour.
Now that I think about it, I wonder how her cousins must be feeling. Sure, they must be proud, but they must be really annoyed with all the “y’know Shyamala auntie’s daughter is a presidential candidate in America” comments.
Anyways…Pokemon go to the polls.